Sometimes, I get really overwhelmed thinking about all the things I wish to do in my life that I’m yet to achieve. Having two children means I often don’t have time to get dressed or brush my hair , let alone achieve things, and I end up seriously stressing myself out trying to cram little bits of writing into any spare second I get during the day.
Today, while I was having a nice, hot bath (the first one not shared with a two year old in as many weeks), my tired mind started drifting through various daydreams. For some reason, the memory of a job interview I intended long ago in the era I like to refer to as “BK” (before kids), came back to me in vivid recollection.
The position I was going for was one of a waitress at a pub out the outskirts of the city I live nearby. I’d just come back from Uni and was trying to find something to do to tide me over while I tried to work out what I actually want to do with my life. I had thought, considering what the job was, that the interview would be more of an informal chat about experience and “what would you do if a customer did this” scenarios. However, the lady interviewing me went all out, asking me all kinds of complicated questions and demanding examples of when I had demonstrated the skills and qualities she desired in her staff. I managed to get through most of it by blagging my answers and improvising. That is until she asked me to “name something you’ve done that you’re proud of”. My mind went completely blank. I’d mentioned getting into University in one of my previous answers, so using it again felt like a cop-out. Besides, I thought to myself at the time, lots of people get into Uni. There was a long ( and I mean long) awkward silence as I struggled to come up with something. It became so uncomfortable that the woman interviewing me actually tried to help me think of an answer, just so we could move past the horrible moment. In the end, I started blathering on about helping a friend who’d been depressed. It was a bit of a heavy topic to be discussing at a waitress interview, and needless to say it made the situation even more uncomfortable than it had been in the first place, the woman not knowing what to say after I’d finished speaking about the issue.
After I’d re-lived the cringe-worthy moment again in my head, it comforted me to think that if I were asked the same question now, I’d have a lot of things I could say as a response. Looking back at all the things I have achieved already, rather was the change in perspective I needed to ease the frustration I often feel. It’s easy to get fed up when you’re passionate about something and simply do not have the time to pursue the goals you so desperately desire. However, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’d be better off reminding myself of the things I’m doing that I am really proud of ( including raising my two boys!), instead of dwelling on what I am yet to do. I may have a long way to go yet in terms of realising all my life ambitions, but at least I have some material now that should ensure I never have to sit through such an awkward, embarrassing interview ever again!